Polar Vortex

I’m 60something and had never heard the term Polar Vortex until this past week.  The meteorologists were having a field day predicting the dire consequences of this latest once-in-a century weather catastrophe.  How’re they going to top this next year?

The weather was really cold everywhere, and there were wild temperature swings around those frigid blasts.  Snow piled up, winds howled and waterfalls froze.  The 24 news and weather channels showed pictures of treacherous conditions over and over as if they were actually continuing rather than being repeated.  People got out their warmest gear, schools and cities were closed, and everyone was encouraged to stay home and be safe.  You’d think nobody ever experienced winter before.

I know I’ve blogged about this in the past because like everyone else I’m driven to being obsessed about the weather.  Maybe that’s why the Weather Channel is the most watched cable station.  But rather than sit indoors and worry about the scenes on the TV we should get up, bundle up and go out and enjoy them.  Maybe this polar cyclone (that’s what a polar vortex really is) is a call from Mother Nature to come out and play.

We all recall winters’ past when records were set and proudly declare how we experienced and survived them.  Remember leggings and boots and mittens and mufflers? Remember seeing the snow swirl in the glow of the streetlights at dusk?  Remember digging tunnels and forts in the snowdrifts and seeing the snow have a blue tint?  If we had stayed indoors back then we wouldn’t have those great memories today.  But we didn’t stay indoors back then because there were no 24-hour news and weather channels telling us not to go out: we looked and decided for ourselves.

I think the 24-hour news cycles are out of control and making us a little bit crazy.  And the last thing we need today is someone making us a little crazier.  So: don't be vexed by a Polar Vortex - turn off the TVs, shut off the computers, and go out and enjoy whatever weather you’re experiencing.  The memories will be worth it.

My message this week is about participating in life to the fullest:

“Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we should dance.” Scout Cloud Lee

What have you hoped for?  As kids, we all dreamed of what we hoped to become when we grew up, and now as adults we’re hopefully living that dream.  Whatever we are, it’s important that we get involved as much as we can to become as much as we can.  There will be good days and bad, happy and sad, more and less exciting and rewarding – and they will all add to whatever we are. So think back on the dreams you had, and while the here and now may not be all that you had hoped for, you should make the most of it.  Smile, be in the moment, extend random acts of kindness, bring joy and happiness to others, and make today and every day all that you want it to be. Do that, and then go ahead and dance!

Stay warm…. and well!

Another Resolution

Another Resolution

How many New Years resolutions have you made in your life?  Most of us make at least one every year, but it’s not how many you make; it’s really how many you keep.

We’ve all made the one about losing weight.  If that were so easy we wouldn’t have to make it a special one, and if we were successful we wouldn’t have to keep repeating it.  And we’ve all made the one about being a better person.  Again, don’t you think that would be one that wouldn’t need repeating?  Or: how many times have you heard or read one and said: “that’s the one”?  Just goes to prove that there’s not much new in the universe.

So what’s the deal with these resolutions anyways?  Presumably they focus us on something that will make us feel or act or be better.  Sure it’s good to have goals, but if any are good to have then there’s no reason to wait for a special occasion to declare and commit to them.

What if every day we got up and just reminded ourselves about: being nice and kind and honest and humble, doing what’s right, smiling and laughing more, saying please and thank you, honoring our mothers and fathers and other elders, speaking well of others, promoting fairness, learning new things, and countless other efforts that help us to be better tomorrow that we are today?

So maybe all of those will be my resolutions for 2014.... and beyond.  And if every morning I remind myself, and if every day I catch myself, and if every evening I remind myself then just maybe I’ll become the person I aspire to be.  And like most things in life, that will be a continuous work in progress.

My message this week is about trying to become the person you want to be:

“When you are content to be simply yourself and don't compare or compete, everyone will respect you.” Lao Tzu

Are you content?  That could refer to money, profession, family, or stature; but it could also refer to whether you’re content with yourself.  Possibly one of the hardest things in life is to like who you are: the person that you see when you look in the mirror.  Do you say and do the appropriate things: the kinds of things that others respect and trust?  Are you kind and considerate: the kinds of characteristics that others appreciate and follow.  Can you be counted on when called upon: the type of person that others can rely on no matter what?  To do any or all of these you must be content with yourself, so don’t compare yourself to or compete with others.  Be open and honest in your dealings with others and everyone will respect you.  Consider this as you begin to live your New Year’s Resolutions this week!

Happy New Year!

Holiday Giving

               Holiday Giving

So it’s the holidays and everyone looks forward to the season of giving.  And while I was probably somewhere between naughty and nice this past year, I still got what I wanted.

Everyone told us that the best part of being a parent is having grandchildren, and when that day finally happened for us we gladly gave up heaven at the beach and moved back to the heat of Las Vegas.  First Olive, and then 18 months later came Ella, and now we’re blissfully surrounded by all that grandchildren have to offer.

Don’t get me wrong: we love being back here with family and friends.  My mother is still going strong at 92, my daughter and her husband are great parents that we love to watch and admire, my big brother and his wife are around for all the good big-brother stuff, and the good friends we made back when are still our good friends now.  But it’s those two granddaughters who make it all worthwhile. 

I’m still awkward when holding a new born, and nobody calls on me to change diapers or give baths…. but when it comes to reading books, being silly, and taking long walks, my name is near the top of the list.  And thanks to the miracle of smartphones with cameras, I have pictures to prove it.

If anyone had asked what I wanted for the holidays, I’d have asked for someone to call me Pop Pop.  And thankfully my wish came true.

My message this week is all about the joys of giving:

“For it is in giving that we receive.” Saint Francis of Assisi

So what did you get for Christmas?  That’s the big question this week and the answers run the gamut from ‘nothing’ to ‘everything’.  If you’re like me, you probably got some cool things you wanted or needed, and others that were unexpected but appreciated, and then some that made you scratch your head and wondered.  And those you gave gifts to probably felt the same even though you most likely put a lot of thought into each.  People have good intentions and try to find things that please, but that’s not always the case.  So I guess it’s best to remember that it’s the thought that counts and that it is in the giving that we receive.  That’s why this or any gift-giving season is a time to give what we can and to be appreciative and thankful for all that we receive.

Happy Holidays to all, and to all a good life!

Commencement

I learned something this semester: there are similarities between school and everything that comes after, but they need to be explained.

In school, students want a syllabus in order to know exactly what to plan for; in life that clarity rarely happens and so they need to learn the art of flexibility. In school, students want to know with certainty what’s going to be on the final exam; in life things are not so well defined and so being broadly prepared is a critical skill to learn.  In school, it’s all about the grade; in life it’s really about whether you can apply what you’ve learned.  And in school there’s a commencement at the end; but, like in the real world, the end is just the beginning.

I explained these and other concepts to my students in the course of our Strategic Management Class: while strategy is often thought of in terms of business, maybe it’s also needed when planning one’s life; and while SWOT analyses are good when determining a business’ direction, it’s also good to know their own strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats; and while the clarity of a mission statement is important to making sure every stakeholder in a business is clearly informed, their individual missions need to be carefully crafted and articulated too. I got the impression that in this, their last semester, these concepts took on a deeper and more urgent meaning within the context of their imminent entry into the real world and the relatively unforgiving nature of life’s multiple-choice options.

The semester came to an end much more quickly than I expected, and I suspect the students were equally as surprised that the end of their academic lives was upon them.  Two busy weeks filled with formal reviews, final exams, final grades, final GPAs and teary hugs as they put on their caps and gowns and prepared for Commencement – the end of college and the beginning of the rest of their lives.

I could see the uncertainty in their eyes as they walked across that stage and into the real world.  Nothing really prepares any of us for that kind of change but maybe now the lessons they learned in class will begin to make more sense.  Maybe that’s why I’m getting requests from so many of them to connect on LinkedIn.  I’m really looking forward to hearing about their experiences in the real world.

My message this week is the one I gave to my students on the last day of class:

“Take pride in who you are as a unique individual by trying to be more today than you were yesterday, more tomorrow than you were today.” Edwin Mamerto

What will you try to be today?  If you’re not trying to be better than you were yesterday then you might end up being worse.  The competition is always looking to see what the new baseline in service and pricing might be, and then developing strategies to outdo you and others. And the best way to avoid getting caught unaware is to keep your eyes and ears open and to continually strive to learn and be more. If it’s leadership: watch other leaders and emulate what you see; if it’s service: visit the competition and see whether they’ve come up with new practices that you should consider; if it’s pricing: always look for process improvements to reduce costs; and if it’s personal style and effort: take pride in who your are and try to be more today than you were yesterday.  That’s how you and your team can be more tomorrow than you were today!

Stay well!

Who Knows Where the Time Goes

Who Knows Where the Time Goes

We saw Judy Collins in concert last month and couldn’t help but reminisce.  And wonder where the time’s gone.

This year’s almost gone and all the times we’ve had in the past 11 months are getting ready to be stored in 2013’s archive.  There’ve been good times and bad, good family young and old, good friends we have or have lost, and good music from then and now. And there was Sweet Judy Blue Eyes telling tales from back in the day and singing songs from along the way.  We closed our eyes, swayed with the music and enjoyed the scenes of our lives as they floated along with the tunes.

Some of the songs she wrote, and some that others wrote.  Her play list took us down memory lane:

Someday Soon

    I would follow him right down the toughest road I know

    Someday soon, going with him, someday soon.

Both Sides Now 

    I've looked at life from both sides now,

    From win and lose, and still somehow

    it's life's illusions I recall.

    I really don't know life at all..

Suzanne

    And you want to travel with her

    And you want to travel blind

    And you know that she will trust you

    For you've touched her perfect body with your mind.

My Father

    On his dreams like boats

    We knew we would sail in time.

The Last Thing on My Mind 

    Are you going away with no word of farewell?

    Will there be not a trace left behind?

    Well, I could have loved you better,

    Didn't mean to be unkind.

    You know that was the last thing on my mind.

Who Knows Where the Time Goes

    For who knows how my love grows?

    And who knows where the time goes?

These are the songs I grew up with.  And in hearing them again all the memories from all those long ago times flashed before me.  Those were good and bad times; they were the times of my life.

Every moment in time can be one of the good times, and add up to become the times we remember.  Maybe that’s what ‘being in the moment’ is all about and why memories are like treasures.  Our times make us what we are and in thinking about them I find myself being thankful for having had those times.  I guess that’s part of what Thanksgiving is all about.

My message this week is about living life to the fullest and being all we ever wanted to be:

“It is never too late to be what you might have been." George Eliot

What do you want to be? Most people have dreams, hopes and aspirations, and they try to accomplish them while also tending to their everyday responsibilities.  And it can happen that those responsibilities take up so much of our time that we might lose sight of what’s needed to stay on track with our dreams.  That’s why it’s important to have goals and a plan to achieve them, to communicate with others so that they don’t inadvertently do, say or assign things that might create a conflict, and to regularly remind us why our goals are important.  Doing these kinds of things can also rekindle the passions we have for the things that are important because, even when they tend to drag on longer than anticipated, it’s never too late to achieve our goals or become what we might have been.  So find and let your passions guide you to be what you want today!

I hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving. 

Stay Well!

Hope

Hope

For those born before November 22, 1963, there was hope.  The world was changing, but everyone felt that our best days were ahead, and in that there was hope.  But then came that fateful day, and hope didn’t seem so eternal.

For those alive on this date 50 years ago, where we were and what we were doing became forever etched in our memories when word of the assassination of JFK flashed across the news.  That memory became mingled with other images of those times: a young President and his wife beginning their day in Dallas; an open limo passing a building; a club owner in a hat shooting the alleged assassin; a young son saluting his fallen father; and an eternal flame.  The nation optimistically supported their leaders and new styles of music, clothes, cars and culture pointed us hopefully towards the future.  And then hope seemed to come to a halt.

Walter Cronkite cried on TV, regular people cried on the street, and we sat in front of our TVs and cried while we watched this incredible event unfold.  Those next 4 days were filled with shock and sadness: if you weren’t there, it’s hard to imagine how stunned and shocked the nation was, or how a single tragic act could so totally change our outlook on life and…. hope.

It’s been 50 years, and yet after all this time the memory of that day still looms large in our minds.  And even though there have been other shocking events since then: the assassinations of Bobby Kennedy and Martin Luther King, Jr., the Vietnam war, the Iranian hostages, the Oklahoma City bombing, 9/11, and so many more (both big and small), the one that happened on this day 50 years ago today seems to represent “the day, the music died” (thank you Don McLean and Bye Bye Miss American Pie).

But all the recent documentaries on the life and legacy of JFK remind us that hope really is resilient.  The images from that event so long ago faded quickly as life went on, and over time those were replaced by the ebb and flow of the regular things that happen, and because we’re all optimists at heart, hope was re-born, re-kindled, and re-established – life does go on after terrible events, and while the memories never go away, the challenge and belief in new horizons help us to go on. Because no matter how long or short a life, it’s only one of many in our vast universe, and if any of those lives is well lived, then, like a comet, it leaves a bright streak across the sky to help light the way for the rest of us.  And in that light there is: hope.

My message this week is based on one of the many quotes from JFK:

“We must find time to stop and thank the people who make a difference in our lives.” John F. Kennedy

We still mourn the death of JFK all those years ago and still marvel at the affect his words continue to have on us after all these years:  asking not what the country can do for us but rather what we can do for the country, responding to the cold war by challenging America to put a man on the moon; and asking us to overcome our prejudices and promote civil rights.  Those were different and difficult times, and as shocking and riveting as those events were, they quickly became part of the larger and continuing patchwork that represented all the times of our lives.  

Looking back now it’s amazing how things like the Beatles’ first appearance on the Ed Sullivan Show just 3 short months later helped us to go on and focus on both the here and now and the future. In hindsight is the understanding that all of the things we experience allow us to keep going and to have hope. The people we meet, the friends and colleagues we have, and the families we love: they all form the nucleus of the lives we lead. And the lesson is this is that no matter what, we must always find time to thank the people who make a difference in our lives.

Stay well!

50

50

I was born in 1950, and for years dreamed of being 50 at the turn of the 21^st century.  I imagined there would be immense personal and world changes when the clock stuck 12 on that millennium; but as we all now know, the hype was more than the reality.  But what’s happened since then has been pretty amazing and fulfilling.

In the intervening years, I opened more hotels, spent time in Las Vegas, China, Laguna Beach, New York City, and the Adirondack Mountains, met lots of interesting people and clients, played a ton of music, became an avid blogger, read voraciously, and enjoyed the arrival of a granddaughter. 

And now, 13 years after that millennial milestone, it’s the 50^th anniversary of my bar mitzvah; in fact, I celebrated that momentous event 50 years ago this weekend.  50 years ago tonight I began the transition from being a boy to becoming a man.  That ritual, which most young Jewish men and women go through on their 13^th birthday, is similar in many ways to other rituals that mark the passage to adulthood.  And while it was cool to think that adulthood starts at 13, I’ve since realized that it only begins then. 

For me that beginning began by reading from the Holy Scriptures in Hebrew, then making a speech, opening lots of presents and having a fun party.  But now I realize that the best part of that event was the awakening of my sense of religion, and then learning things that have stayed with me all these years.  On that weekend so long ago, I read the only portion of the Torah named for a woman (Sarah, the wife of Abraham), and how she shaped the history of the Jews. I recently found the speech about this that I gave back then, and it spurred lots of memories and got me thinking about the richness of life after all these years.

And now, on this 50^th anniversary of that long ago event, I’m literally standing by for the arrival of my second granddaughter.  As I write this, my daughter is down the Hospital hall giving birth…. to a girl, and this is reminding me about the women in my life and the woman in that Torah reading.  Sometime tonight my 92 year-old Mother will have a new great granddaughter, and my wife of 37 years will have a new granddaughter, and my 34-year old daughter will have a second daughter, and her 18 month-old Daughter will have a sister.  Life really does go on, and truly is a blessing!

My message this week is about enjoying the wonders of life:

“Pull up a chair. Take a taste. Come join us. Life is so endlessly delicious.” Ruth Reichl

Every day is full of experiences, challenges, and opportunities.  Those experiences are nothing if you aren’t aware of them, and wide open to their breadth and depth, and possibilities.  They often present challenges because without a crystal ball we can’t predict what’s going to happen, and must be ready to react appropriately and effectively.  And rather than thinking of these as distractions, we should see them as opportunities to do great things.  There’s rarely a day that isn’t filled with one or all of these elements, and there’s excitement and renewal in each and every one of them.  If you find a day that’s missing one or more of these, it’s probably something lacking in you rather than the day itself.  If that happens, stop and examine what in you may be obscuring them.  Then pull up a chair, take a taste, and join fully in your endlessly delicious life!

Stay well!