My Name is Asher Lev

I enjoy reading novels and when I find an author I like I try to read all of their works.  Chaim Potok is one of my favorite authors and he wrote several books, one of which was My Name is Asher Lev. I read this and his other works many years ago, and these left a lasting impression on me.  Books have a way of doing that.

One of the neat things about living in NYC is the diversity of cultural things to do, and the live theater here is great. So when we saw that an adaptation of this book was playing at an off-Broadway theater, we got tickets and went to see it. 

It’s set in post-war Brooklyn and tells the story of a boy prodigy who must be a painter at any cost – against the will of his family, community and tradition.  It is a moving portrait of a young artist with a universal theme about following one’s passion. 

Following one’s passions was a fairly common theme for many in my generation, and the breadth of new and exciting opportunities presented to us seemed endless.  Art, music, science, technology, social mores, drugs – all of these cascaded around us with such intensity and attractiveness – it was a wonder than the culture of our parents survived. That’s what this play was about.

And now that we have kids and grandchildren, most of whom are facing similar challenges, it doesn’t seem all that intense or passionate.  Is that what now being of an age that once seemed so distant does to us?  Are our passions subdued, or have our experiences moderated those passions? I don’t know the answers to those questions, but I do know that the play was excellent, the acting was inspired, and the story was as moving as ever. 

Maybe a good story is what it’s really all about.  Maybe a provocative theme is forever inspiring.  And maybe lessons learned once carry on throughout our lives.  A good book, like great acting, has the ability to teach us lessons that serve us well. And lessons, at any age, are a wonderful thing!

One of my messages this week was about the joy of becoming who you are:

“The secret of happiness lies in the ancient saying: "Become what you are"  Alan Watts

What’s the secret of happiness?  Some will say it’s the love of their life, others that it’s their car; some will say it’s good health, others claim it to be good fortune; still others will say it’s fulfilling their career ambitions, others will say it’s their retirement; and then there are those who will say they’re happy no matter what.  In truth, to be truly happy one has to be in the full realization of who and what they are, to be doing the things that make them feel fulfilled, to feel that what they’re doing makes a difference, and to know that they’ve left nothing undone.  All of these have the potential to add to your happiness, and together these can form the basis for doing great things.  Because only by becoming what you are can you fully achieve the breadth and scope of your capabilities.  Do that and you’ll find happiness and greatness today!

Stay well!

Who Won?

Who Won?
It was quite an election this past week: lots of winners and losers, lots of after-the-fact analyses about why some won and some lost, and lots of polling about what the majority of the people who voted really want. Everybody seems to have an opinion, but nobody seems to be listening.

We elect people to lead us – how come they don’t?  We try to make sense out of all the noise – but the noisemakers are not making sense.  There are lots of assertions – but not a lot of truth. The only thing that everyone seems to agree on is that the partisan bickering has to stop, and nobody believes that it will.

The guy who lost gave a concession speech that made us want to give him another chance – but it was too little, too late.  The guy who won sounded reasonably conciliatory and magnanimous – but will ideology or commonsense prevail?

Politics, like life, is all about the give and take required to keep moving forward. We elect people to figure out solutions to the problems we face but unfortunately, after they get elected, our representatives tend to then make speeches rather than decisions.  And that’s no way to solve problems and move the country forward.

So, who won? If the people we elected, and those who lost, stop bickering and start working together, then we’ll all have won. But if they revert back to the same old partisan and ideological grandstanding, then everyone will have lost.  It should not be about party ideology as much as it should be about honesty, leadership, and working together to address and solve our real problems.  If they realize that – we win; if they don’t – we lose.

Now is the time for serious leadership, not ideological partisanship.  If our elected officials and the parties they’re affiliated with don’t get that then there will be no winners.  Let your elected officials know how you feel if you really want to be a winner in these elections!

One of my messages this week was about working together and winning as a team, and it seems appropriate in light of this week’s events:

“To find a fault is easy; to do better may be difficult.”  Plutarch

What kind of team player are you?  Do you get fully involved with others and support them, or do you stay by yourself and/or complain a lot?  We all know people who are one or the other, and probably have an opinion about which is better.  But seeing this in others isn’t the same as assessing the same in ourselves.  It pays to be an unselfish and committed team player when trying to get stuff done. That means you have to be focused on the task, supportive of what others are doing, being on the look-out for what needs to be done, and always volunteering to help others.  When called upon to do something, you should always give it your best effort, and when others fall short, don’t complain or criticize – look at that as an opportunity to contribute.  So don’t be so quick to find fault, because doing better yourself may be difficult.  Just do your best and give your best all the time – that’s all anyone can ask or expect.

Stay well!

The Night the Lights Went Out

The Night the Lights Went Out

We just don’t think it will happen to us.  Because we don’t want to believe it can happen to us.  Probably because we’re optimists.

And then the Storm of the Century hit.  And it was worse than we ever could have imagined.  All the things we take for granted were mostly gone, in the blink of an eye.  There were warnings.  But who listens to warnings: it’s like the little boy who cried “wolf”!

This might just change everything.  Like: not taking things for granted, and really being prepared, and listening more.  Devastation can do that to you, and whether or not it directly affected you, the pictures and stories on the news have a way of affecting us too.

It might be less about changing things as it is about forcing us to go back to basics: no internet – walk over and check on someone directly; no transportation – car pool; no lights – candles and flashlights; no power – read a book in the daylight or by the firelight.  Think about Abe Lincoln – he not only read by firelight, he also seems to have gotten his law degree that way too. Because he couldn't, and now we can’t, get away from the dark, we must rely on our basic instincts and capabilities to deal with it. 

These days, cell phones and the Internet are our primary means of connecting, and they mostly weren't working this week.  And without them we were really in the dark and had to improvise to connect with others.  We had to walk over and knock on someone's door (if we could), or wait until conditions improved. But connect we did because we need personal contact: to let us know we’re not alone and reassure us that others are there and care.

So the moral of this story is that while some things change, others stay the same.  We use the tools we have to stay close to family and friends and colleagues and community.  And as long as we know they are all safe then we can start to return to normal and rebuild.  Make sure your basics are in place today and be prepared if your lights go out.

My message this week is about study and preparation:  

“No one can ever reach to excellence in any one art or profession without having passed through the slow and painful process of study and preparation.”  Horace

How will you prepare to do what you have to do today? Will it come by you naturally, or will you have to work hard to prepare for it? There are lots of people who are naturals at what they do – singers naturally come by their trade because they have good pitch, and public speakers mostly do well because they don’t fear being in front of audiences, and of course service employees like helping others. But those are just the things that help you get started – after that it’s a slow and painful process of study and preparation if you are to excel at what you do.  And (like your mother said): "if anything is worth doing, it’s worth doing well"; so commit to the study and preparation that’s needed if you want to be good at what you do and to be rewarded for it.  That’s how to succeed at the art of your profession!

Stay well!                                                                                     

Heroes

Heros Remember when athletes were heroes?  I clearly remember when I was a kid cheering for the New York Giants and feeling terrible when the other team knocked out Y.A. Tittle on a frozen gridiron; and listening to those epic battles between Bill Russell (he was and still is my favorite) and Wilt Chamberlain on the radio; and staying up late to hear the boxing match when Cassius Clay knocked out Floyd Patterson. I remember Sandy Koufax, Willie Mays, Mickey Mantle and Jackie Robinson – baseball players who were large in life and cherished on baseball cards? And what about those American hockey players who won the gold medal at the 1980 Olympics – we shared the thrill of victory outrunning the agony of defeat. Those were the kinds of heroes that we looked up to: they won and lost… honestly, and proudly. So this week’s news about Lance Armstrong being stripped of all his Tour de France victories was terribly disappointing.  It’s sad when athletes who have so much going for them turn out to be more interested in winning at all costs than competing fairly.  What happened to “it’s not whether you win or lose, but how you play the game”? Remember Bruce Jenner and Marylou Retton: they were proud to win, and proud to have their pictures on a box of Wheaties.  They inspired us to do and be more. I guess we have to look beyond the bizarre behavior of the greedy and take note of those who work hard, care a lot, compete fairly and accept what happens with grace.  You’ll find them everywhere: at work and play, in the groups of people you hang with, and in the neighborhoods where you live. They are, or should be, our role models, and while they may be athletes, more often they’re regular, soft-spoken and humble people we know and are around most of the time: friends, parents, siblings, neighbors, and good Samaritans in the news.  Look around today and note all the good people who influence you by their beliefs and behaviors.  And then strive to be like them… because they’re the real heroes. My message this week is about being proud of who and what you are: "The key to a happy life is to have accomplishments to be proud of and purpose to look forward to.”  Jeff Lindsay Jeff Lindsay is the pen name of American playwright and crime novelist Jeffry P. Freundlich (born July 14, 1952), best known for his novels about sociopathic vigilante Dexter Morgan. Are you happy? Not the kind of happy where you’re laughing or walking around with a silly grin on your face, but rather the kind that makes you feel good about yourself.   And the key to feeling good about yourself is knowing who you are and what you’re capable of, and having the knowledge, skills and abilities that are born of experience and confidence, and using those competencies to do good things for those who are counting on you, and believing you’re okay and feeling good about that.  Put these into place in your life and you’ll have accomplishments to be proud of and purpose to look forward to.  And then you’ll be happy, and those around you will be happy, and success will more easily be yours! Stay well!

Wooly Bear Caterpillars

Wooly Bear Caterpillars Last fall a farmer I know pointed out that there were way more apples on the trees than normal and he said that was a clear sign that it was going to be a long, hard winter.  Wrong – it was probably one of the mildest winters in history. Last week a neighbor pointed out the brownish stripes on several wooly bear caterpillars:  a sure sign, he said, that it’s going to be a mild winter.  According to legend, the wider that middle brown section is, the milder the coming winter will be. Conversely, a narrow brown band is said to predict a harsh winter.  But who knows if that’s really true. Throughout history there have been good years and bad, good winters and hard winters, more rain and less rain; people just accepted those things and took them in stride.  These days there’s a feeling that we need to make more sense out of things, but it’s not that simple because unfortunately there are no simple explanations for the complexities of life. There are still things like weather and human behaviors that have far too many variables to be explained simply.  But that doesn’t stop us from always looking to understand “why”. I saw dozens of wooly bear caterpillars last week and to me it looked like their brownish strips were growing longer.  But we won’t know what that means until next spring when we look back and see what kind of winter it really was.  And that’s the way it is with most things.  Until then, I’ll just bundle up on the cold and rainy days, and turn my face to the sky on those days when the sun shines warmly.  And take each day as it comes! My message this week is about innovation and how people make things better: "Without leaps of imagination or dreaming, we lose the excitement of possibilities. Dreaming, after all is a form of planning.” Gloria Steinem Gloria Marie Steinem (born March 25, 1934) is an American feminist, journalist, and social and political activist who became nationally recognized as a leader of, and media spokeswoman for, the women's liberation movement in the late 1960s and 1970s. What do you dream about at work?  You should also be dreaming about the kinds of things that can help make what you’re doing to be easier and better. Everyone thinks that supervisors and process improvement specialists are the only ones who can do this, but the people doing the work, talking to the customers, touching the products, and delivering the services are the ones who have the experience and knowledge, and the best perspective, to know what’s really happening and whether improvements are needed.  They’re the ones who should be encouraged to imagine and recommend the exciting improvements that are possible, and to help determine what can be achieved.  That’s the best way to use your imagination and dreams today.  So, dream on! Stay well!

Coming Home

Coming Home

Last week when traveling home I noticed a military man in uniform on our plane.  As we landed, the attendant asked us to remain seated to allow this soldier to exit first; he was escorting a fallen comrade home and needed to meet the casket as it was unloaded from the plane.

After everyone got off the plane, all of the passengers gathered at the windows in the terminal to watch this sad procession: men and women, young and old, black and white, soldier and civilian stood there silently and witnessed this very moving event.  On the tarmac next to the hearse were the family, an honor guard, and all of the ground maintenance staff – at attention, with their emotions clearly displayed.

The terminal was silent.  The crowd stood at attention.  And as the flag-draped casket was lowered into the arms of the honor guard, the soldiers saluted, the family consoled one another, and everyone in the terminal wept.

No matter what we think of war, fallen soldiers touch us all.  Every generation suffers war, and none has found a way to prevent it.  Every one of us is touched in some way by those who fight, and we can’t thank them enough for their brave efforts.

So we salute and cry, and reflect, when faced with a scene like this.

We need to do more.  If you see a soldier today, thank him or her; they serve and fight for all of us. Let’s hope and pray they all come home safely and soon.

Amen.

My message this week is about integrity:

"Men acquire a particular quality by constantly acting in a particular way." 

-Aristotle

Aristotle (384 BC – 322 BC) had a profound influence on the philosophical and theological thinking in the Islamic and Jewish traditions in the Middle Ages, and he continues to influence Christian theology.

How do you normally act? Do you act differently in different circumstances, like at home or work, or when hanging out with friends, or when you’re playing or praying?  While some people may act differently in these different situations, most are who and what they are, and act the same.  Actions like: telling the truth, being open and transparent, making eye contact, not taking yourself too seriously, having a sense of humor, smiling and laughing easily, being kind, paying attention to details, treating others with respect, trusting others, and doing the things that make others trust you - these are rooted in common sense and are based on the simple notion that people do what they want others to do to them.  These actions show that you care about others.  And that’s what integrity is really all about: it’s a particular quality that’s acquired by constantly acting in a particular way.  Act like you really care today and every day, and see how others perceive and respond to you.

Stay well!

62 Special

62 Special   Twenty years ago I spotted a 1956 Cadillac Fleetwood for sale – it was a 62 Special.  It was the pride of Detroit when it came out, but its best years had faded by the time I found it. I restored it and drove it and had fun reliving the times of my youth when my Mom had one like it.  I remember my Dad thinking at the time that I was crazy to take on a restoration job for something that he considered not altogether priceless.  But I did and really loved that 62 Special.  And as I celebrate my 62nd birthday this week I have a different perspective on what’s so special about that number. In my 62 years I’ve done some things that have been special.  Work is special: I believe I was born to be an HR guy, and the things I’ve been able to accomplish have been special.  Helping people is special: helping people find satisfaction in their work and get ahead in their careers is pretty special.  Music is special: singing harmonies with other sounds and feels special. In my 62 years I’ve had some really special relationships. Family is special: Having lived and grown with those I love, I know how great it is to be around people who are so special.  Friends are special: I’ve learned that it’s not the quantity but the quality, and I know it takes hard work to keep those relationships special.  My wife is special: her caring, understanding, creative and loving companionship is always and ever so special. My daughter is special: while it always amazes me that we lived through it all, I know that those experiences make our relationship special.  And last but certainly not least, my granddaughter is special: she reminds me of the fact that life and legacies are indeed special. We all get so caught up in the things that are happening that we often lose sight of what’s important, and special.  We keep searching for the next new thing and often overlook the things we have that are currently so special.  And when we forget how special the people we love, and who love us, are, then we lose that special something that makes love so precious and memorable and worth living. So as I look back over these 62 years, I am reminded of all that I have: not the material stuff, but the special people that are special to me.  And as I spend this birthday with my granddaughter I realize how it all fits together: the yesterdays and todays always add to the richness of all the tomorrows.  And that’s my 62 Special! My message this week is about being involved enough to get the most out of life: “Life may bring you to your knees; pray. Then GET UP and participate in the answer. BECOME the remedy! BE the solution!”   -Steve Maraboli Steve Maraboli, Ph.D., has risen to international prominence as a recognized leader in business development, personal enhancement, peak performance and an authority on the human potential and organizational behavior. If someone were to ask your supervisor or colleagues or family or friends whether you were part of the problem or the solution, what would they say?  Think about it: when there’s a project, or a problem, or just your regular work – do you handle it maturely, and approach it with a positive outlook, and work well with others, and complete your work on time and to everyone’s satisfaction, and do you maintain your composure in the face of challenges?  These are the kinds of things that people look for when you participate with them to get things done.  Because working hard, caring about the outcomes, and being sensitive to and appreciative of the work of others improves how people work together?  Life and work can bring us to our knees, but the people we want around us when that happens are those who become part of the remedy and the solution.  Strive to be one of those people today! PS: That’s 5-month old Olive wishing me a happy birthday. Stay well!